The Recovery Run (Run 56)

Sundays in my training schedule are reserved for "recovery runs." Basically, short runs that follow more intense training runs (Saturdays are always long runs) to loosen up your muscles to prepare for a rest day (today). I think of it as "active rest."

Last night, I did my recovery run just before 9 p.m. The sun had gone down, but it wasn't completely dark yet. The feeling of running in the almost darkness, while people prepared for their Monday mornings and work weeks was empowering. It reminded me to be thankful for my legs that have allowed me to follow up an almost 8-mile run on Saturday afternoon with an easy three-miler (with a few light hills). As a female, it's so easy to get caught up in your insecurities and perceived and actual physical flaws. It's easy to think "my thighs could be smaller" or "my calves could be more shapely." It's hard to remember that having legs and having the ability to run (even walk) are gifts, which are easy to take for granted.

I have put over 170 miles on my feet, calves, thighs, hips, etc. since I started training. They haven't let me down (aside from a little pain). I still crave more speed, but I know that will come with time. Right now, I'm thankful for this rest day.

Running Soundtrack

I have been trying to make a new playlist each run. I take my old playlist and add it to my "Used Running Tracks" playlist. I have listened to over 200 songs while running (some repeated, and of course, some runs I am chatting with my running partner and not listening to music). Here are some of the artists that have kept me motivated over the miles:

AC/DC, Alicia Keys, Alkaline Trio, All-American Rejects, American Hi-Fi, Amy Winehouse, Audioslave, The Bangles, Bayside, Beastie Boys, Beck, Beyonce, Billy Idol, Black Eyed Peas, The Blakes, Blink-182, Blondie, Boysetsfire, Brand New, The Bravery, Buffalo Tom, Chemical Brother, Chevelle, Chingy, Chris Isaak, Christina Aguilera, Common, Consequence, Counting Crows, Crystal Method, Daft Punk, Deee-Lite, DMX, Does It Offend You Yeah?, The Donnas, Duran Duran, Eminem, Fall Out Boy, Fat Joe, Fatboy Slim, Fergie, Filter, Flyleaf, Foo Fighters, Franz Ferdinand, The Fratellis, George Michael, Ginuwine, Gorillaz, Green Day, Guns N' Roses, Halifax, Hilary Duff, The Hives, Hole, Jamiroquai, Jane's Addiction, Janet Jackson, Jay-Z, Jedi Mind Tricks, Jet, Jill Sobule, Jimmy Eat World, Justin Timberlake, Kanye, Kelis, Kelly Clarkson, Korn, Lily Allen, Linkin Park, LL Cool J, Ludacris, Lupe Fiasco, Lucious Jackson, Lyrics Born, Madonna, Marilyn Manson, Marky Mark, Mary J. Blige, Michael Jackson, Mims, Missy Elliott, Moby, Modest Mouse, Morningwood, Motley Crue, Muse, My Chemical Romance, NAS, Nelly, NWA, Outkast, Phantom Planet, Poison, Prince, The Prodigy, The Rapture, Rev Run, Rihanna, Rise Against, Rob Base, The Roots, Run DMC, Saul Williams, Sean Paul, Sheryl Crow, The Strokes, Sugarhill Gang, Switches, Tha Liks, The Used, Young Gunz, 10 Years, and 50 Cent.

I am clearly all over the map, and I always love recommendations!

No One Said This Was Going to Be Easy (End of Week 11)

Week 11 started with a missed run* and ended with vomiting and overheating on an 8-miler. It included hill sprints, stair repeats, sore legs, a blister,** an unexpected generous donation from my favorite tattoo artist, and an inspiring video from Sean "P.Diddy/Puffy/Puff Daddy" Combs about running.***

Thirteen weeks to go until my race. I can run faster, farther, and harder than I could more than 165 miles ago (about the distance I have ran since I started training).****

*I added the time from my missed run to my other runs and made sure to get in the full amount of running time allotted for the week.

**The blister was from walking around in heels all day--peep toes, which I wear less often than closed-toes.

***The Sean Combs video can be found here: http://dailyviews.runnersworld.com/2008/07/diddys-treadmil.html. Diddy reminds runner to be conscious of the run and for the blessing that it is--being alive and being able to run. Sure, a lot of jokes can be made about Mr. Combs, but the man did train for and run the NYC Marathon a few years back.

****I have missed a few runs here and there, so my overall mileage is a bit below the mileage prescribed. I'm confident that I'll be able to complete the race in 13 weeks.

[Also, this post was originally longer and more thoughtful, but I had a computer/internet issue and lost all my work.]

Reasons to Run...the TNT Mission

Throughout my 10+ weeks of training with TNT, our coaches and mentors, as well as our teammates have encouraged us to keep aware of the reason we are running--not the physical benefits and the team bonding (although those are great things), but to help raise money for blood cancer research and ultimately a cure. It's easy to forget those things, especially when you think about the cancer survivors.

Of course, not everyone can be a survivor. I had a grandmother and an aunt who lost their battles with cancer. They were both much older when they passed away, so while it's still a tragic loss, it's not the same as when it's a child. Just today, I read about an 8-year-old British boy who died of leukemia recently. The article was short, but the little boy seemed so wise for his age and emotionally strong. The part of the story that really got the tears flowing had to do with the fact that his parents had arranged a pseudo-wedding ceremony so the little boy could "marry" his school sweetheart. He died the day after the ceremony. The entire article can be found here: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/2443562/Dying-eight-year-old-%27marries%27-his-school-sweetheart.html.

Tomorrow morning, when I get up for my run early in the morning and I debate about whether I want to get out of bed, I'll be thinking about him. I'll be thinking about him, too, when I ask for donations to Team in Training for the benefit of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, so that I don't have to read anymore stories like this one in the future.

The Gold Run (Run 50)

Saturday was another team run--this time at Mirabeau in the Valley (to hop on the Centennial Trail)--so it was much, much more flat than last week's team run.* I ran with Heather Butner again, and I must say that although I am certainly stepping up to keep pace with her (she is probably around 8 inches taller than I am), it's really nice to go out for a long run and have someone to talk to and work through the miles. A 60-minute training run* is considerably faster (in terms of the feeling of time passing) when you are having a conversation. Granted, I find myself out of breath and asking Heather very open-ended question so that she has to do more of the talking, but I am contributing.

It's really encouraging to be out at the team runs, particularly when Curtis and Kendra Edlin are out practicing with us. Curtis is in a 5-year remission from Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma (after five months of chemo), and he is currently being treated for Chronic Myeloid Leukemia. Curtis and is wife Kendra are out training with us with Team in Training--and fundraising--even though Curtis is currently being treated for Leukemia. It's pretty amazing to see someone faced with such a serious battle who is out training and fundraising to help himself and others. It certainly makes your feet keep moving once you hit that 6th or 7th mile.

Redistribution (Run 49)

Running is highly touted as a means to fitness, weight loss, and cardiovascular health. I don't disagree with any of these assertions, other than perhaps the weight loss portion. I didn't start training to lose weight, but getting rid of the remaining few pesky pounds that migrate around my midsection (my law school pudge, as I call it) would certainly have been welcome. Since I have started training, I have noted that my calves and thighs are stronger (and smaller) and that my law school pudge is less, well, pudgey. However, the scale has not moved (I know, muscle weighs more than fat, blah blah).

I am most concerned--shocked, saddened, unhappy--about the reduction in size of another part of my anatomy. I won't "flat"-out name it, but, let's just say that a certain letter no longer refers to the grades I got when I was in school (hint: I was the Honor Society Prez in high school, so I got straight A's). Sure, it makes running easy--as there's no top heaviness or back ache (or the need to find a really good sports bra), but, it was deflating for me to have the big splurge of my trip to the Nordies Anniversary Sale be small, small support garments that I could actually fill-out. Let's just say they are in a size that I haven't worn since I was 12 (and, I did not have hips when I was 12--or law school pudge).

I told a few of the coaches and mentors for Team in Training (all women) that I was fairly certain by the time we are done, I'll be able to run topless and it won't be offensive (although, people may wonder why that little boy running has hips--and shaved legs and feminine features). I joked with Heather Butner, a fellow Team in Training runner (training for the full marathon and a former high school classmate of mine) that my current situation was the reverse of high school track girls--those who suddenly fill out after freshman year and notice their pace and endurance changing. So, perhaps I am en route to being a twiggy fifteen-year-old. I guess there are worse things.

Every Little Step I Take*

This week, I have received some very generous donations. Between Monday and today (Friday morning at 10 a.m.), I have received $1,075.00 in donations. This is more than 1/4 of the donations needed for me to reach my minimum fundraising goal. I am amazed and touched by the generosity of all of my donors--regardless of the dollar value of the donation.

I may be most impressed by my less-than-one-year old niece, who donated $25 dollars to me this week--not only is she computer savvy, but she also managed to get access to her mom's credit card!

I have begun sending out reminders to persons that I sent fundraising letters and emails to back in late May. I know the economy sucks and money is tight for everyone, but I wouldn't be asking for money if it weren't for a good cause. It's not like I am asking for someone to fund my trip to the Nordstom Anniversary Sale (which started this morning--or at midnight last night if you shopped online). Please don't think that any donation would be too small...$1 or $5 or $10 or $1,000 (I know, not small)--all these amounts add up and will help towards the ultimate goal of Team in Training--to eradicate cancer. That's our team's mission and this year, Team in Training is likely going to hit the $1 billion mark. Please consider helping add to that total.

And, many thanks to my donors of this week**: Anonymous, Barry Davidson, Judith Elder, John and Jan Giesa, Travis and Erin Haynes, Ralph Leutz, MacKenzie Lovchik, Melanie Giesa Marshall, and Jackie Witter. Your kind comments on my fundraising page and your personal notes have been very encouraging.

*As I wrote that line, I was taken back to St. Francis School in New Haven, CT--where I am fairly certain at 12 or 13 I danced to the Bobby Brown song of the same name at a mixer with the other parochial junior highs in town.

**Many thanks to my previous donors as well!

Hill Repeats (Run 47)

Tuesdays are currently hill runs on my training schedule. This week, instead of running a hilly course, I ran hill repeats on the Centennial Trail. Since the trail is right across the street from my office, I headed west on the trail (on the south side of the river) to the bridge over Hamilton Street. From my office to the Hamilton bridge it's just over 1.5 miles, so a good warm-up before I tackled the actual hill.

Once I hit the hill, I was in L.T mode (LaDanian Tomlinson not Lawrence Taylor).* I had seen a few interviews with L.T. over the past few years in which he talked about running the sandy hills behind his home to condition himself for running routes. I know that Tiki Barber, pre-retirement, did the same thing in the Jersey hills. So, my hill wasn't sand, but I am preparing to run a half-marathon, not preparing to run a route while men who are 6'5" and 300lbs. try to pummel me into the earth. With thoughts of L.T. in my mind, I sprinted up one side of the hill and walked down the other, for six repeats. I was out of breath by the time I reached the hill's peak on each sprint, but I felt so strong and accomplished.

I ran the rest of the way back to my office (on the north side of the river) with tired legs and a positive outlook.

*I am fairly certain the original L.T. (Lawrence Taylor) "trained" by cutting back on the amount of cocaine and the number of "escorts" he consumed. I am pretty sure that is not the best training method for me to follow, even though it clearly worked from him.

Almost to the Halfway Point (in Donations)

Yesterday morning, when I checked my email at work (which I do first thing every morning while drinking my coffee from Madeleine's) and saw that I had received two new donations towards my $4,000.00 fundraising goal, one for $50 from Judith Elder and one for $100 from "Anonymous." I also received $100 from Ralph Leutz that day. Then, this morning, I received $25 from my niece MacKenzie (who is not even a year-old, but very computer savvy).

So, my fundraising total has now reached $1,900.00 as of this morning.* A big thanks to all who have sent donations--I really appreciate it, and I know it is going for a good cause. Also, for the "Anonymous" donors, I must apologize that I cannot personally thank you, as Team in Training and LLS do not provide me with contact information or names of any of my anonymous donors. I would love to thank you personally.

Finally, I know that I have asked many people for money. Please do not feel like you can't donate because your donation will be too small. Every dollar donated actually makes a difference, so even if you want to donate a dollar, you're still helping the cause.

*As a reminder, my fundraising page (see the link on the right) does not auto-update donations that are personally given to me or mailed in--please be patient to see your donation appear on my fundraising page if you donated other than online.

Friday Night Lights (Out Before Ten)

Running requires sacrifice. At least, that's what all the running ads tell you. Friday nights have been a sacrifice for me as my long runs early on Saturday morning become earlier and longer. I am now running a minimum of 6 miles every Saturday morning with the team, and these runs begin at 6:30 a.m. at locations to which I have to drive. So, in order to be up around 4:30 a.m. on Saturdays to eat something that will give me energy but won't upset my stomach during my long runs, I have to be in bed around 9:30 or so on Friday night.

This means that last Friday (the 11th), I ate a yummy pasta dinner (prepared by me), watched a little "Dog Whisperer,"* and went to bed early. I missed a text from my friend Kevin Blocker about going out--that text was received at 11:00 p.m., when I was fast asleep.** I may as well be watching "Golden Girls" and getting up for the early bird special at Denny's.

Oh yeah, I'm 30. Not 80.

*I love the "Dog Whisperer." I probably (definitely) like dogs more than people and Mr. Milan's way with animals is truly astonishing. I find myself using some of Mr. Milan's phrases, such as the "cchhsshhh" sound he uses as a "correction," as well as "live in the now" and "just a touch." I need a pet.

**I don't mind the texts late night. I never wake up when I receive them late. Plus, I don't want anyone to think that I am just ignoring them for no reason--I always text back the next morning (not at 4:30 a.m.) to thank friends for the invites which I cannot accept.

All I Needed Was a Little Ego Boost (End of Week 9)

Week 9 was an up and down of emotion and ability, which started off with my bad run that ended Week 8.* Week 9 ended with our long team run (Run 45) at 6 a.m. on Saturday morning on the Centennial Trail by SFCC (very, very hilly). I ended up running the first 30 minutes of my supposed-to-be 60** minute run with a girl that I had gone to high school with, Heather Butner, formerly Heather Silvey. Heather was always a star athlete and sprinter in both high school and college. There was no way I could ever have kept pace with her in high school. She and I knew of each other, but never really knew one another during that time. She was always very friendly, and I knew she was one hell of a runner.

So, Saturday morning, bright and early, I find myself running with--and keeping up with--Heather on a very hilly course, very early in the morning on Saturday.*** Now, I understand that sprinting and distance running are two very different creatures (Heather even commented as much), but for me to keep pace with someone I'd always considered a strong, fast runner really changed my bad-attitude that had dominated the end of Week 8 through a good part of week 9. Thanks, Heather!

In addition to be able to keep pace with a good runner, I get a little ego boost every team practice by finishing first. This is not because I am the fastest (far from it--I think that Aileen Laughlin, my friend Meg's little sis may be the fastest out there--and the fastest woman at the least), but because I run with the people who are completing a full marathon. They are running almost twice the distance that I am during our long runs to prepare themselves for the twice-as-long race in October (26.2 miles v. 13.1 miles). During practice we all run out in the same direction and turn around based on what our race distance is (half or full marathon) and what our pace is (over or under the 12-minute-mile mark). The half-marathoners running under a 12-minute-mile (that would be me, and...me) have to run for the least amount of time during out team runs.

So, I get to turn around sooner. Now, I know that many of my team members and coaches realize that I am a "halfer," but I can tell by the looks on some of my teammates faces (mostly the walkers) that not everyone realizes this. The coaches always give us a max turn around point for the runs, as in, even if your reach mile marker x before you are supposed to turn around (based on your time limits), turn around anyway (and add distance to the other end point of your run). I think some of these other teammates assume that I have reached the max turn around point at mile x, and that I have turned around to head back--very quickly. Sometimes I'll say some encouraging words to those teammates that I am passing in the opposite direction and let them know that I am a "halfer," but sometimes I just let them think that this short, 30-year-old girl who claims to be a "new runner" is just a natural.

*See my earlier posting, "Running Just Might be a Pearl Izumi Ad."

** The trail is a bit confusing by SFCC, so on my way back to the parking lot via the trail, I missed a turn and ended up all the way on the other side of SFCC. The team coaches and mentors looked at me strangely as I came running from the other side of the lot to the water station at the end of my run. This confusion added another 10+ minutes and probably close to 1.5 miles to my run.

*** I realize that "very early" is not 6:30 a.m. for many people, but I am NOT a morning person.

Some Like It Hot* (Run 43)

Last night I did my 30 minute run in 90 degree weather with a warm, fairly strong wind. Not my best run, but it felt great to really sweat. For me, running in high temperatures is comparable to running through sand. Not in sand--as in a run on the beach--but through sand, as if I were running through a swimming pool filled waist-high with sand. My muscles are looser while running in the heat, but each stride requires more effort than it does in cooler weather.

Last night's hot run was fueled by the following playlist: "Good Girls, Bad Guys," DMX feat. Dyme; "Drama Queen," Switches; "Longview," Green Day; "4 Minutes," Madonna feat. Justin Timberlake & Timbaland; "So What'cha Want," Beastie Boys; "11h30," Danger; "We Thuggin' (Remix)," Fat Joe; and "Control Myself," LL Cool J feat. J-Lo.

*The title references the Robert Palmer song, not the film.

Run 'Til You Puke (Or, At Least 'Til You "Spit Up")

I am unsure what the line between puking and "spitting up" is, but I think last night's hill and stairs run (Run 42) included spitting up, but I'll get to that.

After my miserable end to week 8 and after spending too much time on the Pearl Izumi running site (see my previous post), I went out last night for a tough hill run, determined to run until it hurt. There's a hill route that goes west on Riverside, down the hill towards Peaceful Valley, and leads to the top of the hill by Hamblen/Hamlen Conservation area. The hill up to the Conservation area is a looping 1/4 mile of climb. The hill back up Riverside heading east is a full 1/2 mile from start to finish. I successfully ran (or, at least shuffled towards the end) both hills, and then I threw in the stairs by the MAC.

Upon summiting the final stair (I believe there are 5 flights), I spit up. I think spitting up is a more accurate description than puking. My stomach contents at the time were solely water and Kiwi-Strawberry Carb Boom gel, and the regurgitation wasn't the gut-clearly event that puking is. I am fairly certain that I have not run harder in my life.

Part of my motivation (aside from the Pearlisms about running v. jogging) was a man with his daughter on the Centennial Trail. The girl looked like she was about 14, and she was in a wheel chair. My uneducated diagnosis of her condition was cerebral palsy. As I was midway up the 1/2 mile hill, I thought about her and the fact that she would like never run--and had not likely ever run. Perhaps I needed a new perspective on running--recognizing that I was lucky or blessed or privileged to be able to even actually physically run, regardless of factors like pace, endurance, etc.

Running Just Might Be A Pearl Izumi Ad (End of Week 8)

The last few months I have noticed several ads from Pearl Izumi in both Runner's World and Outside which denounce jogging. No, Pearl Izumi has not abandoned the sports in which you lace up sneakers and hit the road, trail, or treadmill* and move in a motion that is faster than walking. Rather, Pearl Izumi is making a distinction between running and jogging.

I read an article (possibly on www.runnersworld.com) that said whatever your pace, you are a runner and not a jogger. Being a jogger implied that you were not serious about the sport, so if you ran a 4-minute mile or a 16-minute mile you were a runner. Since my pace is in that 4-to-16-minute mile range, I decided that I must be a runner.

The Pearl Izumi ads play on the same notion, and they even reference a website for Pearl Izumi gear and "inspiration": www.wearenotjoggers.com/home. The "We Are Not Joggers" site contains two chapters (so far) of a flip-through book which explains the difference between running and jogging. Basically--running is harder. You do not look cute when you run. Running is painful. Running is a feeling, and that feeling is not good. The site is quick to point out that runners can jog, but really they are just running slowly. However, joggers never run. No matter how fast they jog. Basically, Pearl Izumi is making running a bit elitist.

If you know me at all, you know elitism is not one of my turn-offs. However, I am not sure if running wants me to be part of its club. I have been training for 8 weeks, and in my mind, I should be a considerably better runner than I currently am. Sure, I can run for a long time. And, I can run for long distances. But, I wish I could run for a long time and/or a long distance (the two can be mutually-exclusive) at a faster pace. It is hard to remind myself that I am new at running, and the initiation into the running club is hard. My long run on Saturday was miserable (see above, running is hard and does not feel good). I ran two good miles, and then a combination of my mind, my body, and my ego just gave up--would not let me run, run slow, or jog. I could not overcome the mental hurdle that morning. I wasn't really sore; I wasn't really breathing heavily; but, I just wasn't in the mental part of my running game. Like when Andy Roddick always loses in big tournaments. Everyone knows he's a great tennis player with a huge serve and serious athleticism--but he falls apart in the mental game, and he loses.

My mental game was non-existent on Saturday. I ended up walking another four miles that morning, mostly in tears. I felt betrayed by running. Kicked out of the club. But really, I was betrayed by me. I want to be part of that running club, so today, I'm going to try again.

*Pearl Izumi's "We Are Not Joggers" website specifically states that while their shoes work just fine on treadmills, you cannot run on a treadmill--you are only jogging, no matter what your pace is.

Donations (A Follow-Up to the 36, 7, 40 Post)

As of this morning, I have received $1625 in donations--$2375 to reach my goal. I just wanted to thank, again, all of my donors to date: Anonymous 1; Anonymous 2; John Bakken; Laura Carl; Sheri Engelken; Devon, Peter, & Abbey Gay; Jan & John Giesa; Ed & Ginny Haynes; June Haynes; Kitty Janssen; Carole Kasper; Trisha Kissler; Daniel Kratz; Jen, Ryan, and MacKenzie Lovchik; Chad Keller; Trisha Pfeifer; the partners at Reed & Giesa, P.S.; Rich & Deb Rogers; Barb & Jim Whitely; and me.

Skipping, Stairs, Snake Charmers (Runs 37 & 38)

I skipped run 37 yesterday (a scheduled 40-minute hill run). I am not giving up on running and training, rather, I have had a general "over it" attitude about everything of late, so my pouty attitude + really hot weather = sitting on the couch watching Olympic Trials and "Throwdown" with Bobby Flay instead of running. This lame attitude got me nowhere, but I did get to watch Mr. Phelps (aka Aquaman) break another world record (which was previously held by him), and I learned that coconut cake is primarily made of butter (literally pounds of it) and heavy cream--no wonder it tastes so good.

Anyhow, as my previous post mentioned, watching Olympic athletes (particularly swimmers and runners with their ridiculously low body fat percentages--google 40-year-old Olympic hopeful Dana Torres) is both motivating and disheartening, so this morning I did my 30 minute run (I actually ran 35), but I threw in three sets of stairs at the MAC (Metropolitan Museum of Arts, I believe--the museum in Browne's Addition). Each set of stairs included 6 or 7 flights (I couldn't get an accurate count, as my breath started to run out at the top of each flight). I am going to run twice tomorrow (at least that's the plan) to make sure I maintain the right mileage for my training schedule.

Finally...I try to run early in the morning. It's gotten quite hot in Spokane, so night runs are out of the question unless I want to run around midnight. Usually the only people I see are other runners and people walking their dogs. This morning, in addition to those two categories of people, I also saw a man wearing what appeared to be a red bathrobe--not the kind that ties at the waist, but the kind that my mom used to wear in the early-1980's, that slips over your head and has a zipper that comes down to your chest. The man was walking west on Pacific and playing what appeared to be a recorder, you know the instrument everyone learns in third grade music class? He looked like he was attending an Arabian Nights-type costume party dressed as a snake charmer. I was tempted to run by to get a closer look, but I decided against it.